He has a plan

In Novermber 2009, I think I was a little too excited. I felt like 12 months would be like nothing. But I feel like I can barely make it to 6 months... But I'll be ok because I know God is my strength! And when the time is right, I'll be back in ESSJ :) It's all in His hands & in His time!!!

I learned a lot out here though. I think I've done a lot of growing up. I learned to survive & be independent from my parents. I learned how to cook food that I can actually eat! Haha. I finally learned how to manage my money correctly... Haha I can finally keep my "room" in order. And most importantly, I have a greater appreciation for everyone & everything in my life.

Maybe God had to take me out of my comfort zone so I could see what He has blessed me with. And if I didn't take this job, I wouldn't have seen or experienced all of that.

But I still miss home :(

<3,
Am

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He's got my back :)

Hahah. Yup!

So I had to go to the office for like 20 minutes after lunch & I decided to walk. It was sunny when I left my apartment & I took the 10 minute route. On my way back, I decided to walk through the neighborhood, the long way... So I'm walking & then it starts to get dark. Its windy & it got really cold. Now I'm thinking, "craaap man!" I'm like a mile away. & so I'm praying it doesn't rain...

And praise God! It didn't. It started to sprinkle once I got to the plaza next to my complex. But now it's pouring! Craaaaaazy! God is always watching out for me! Even in the little things. Like walking to & from work :) I believe He prompted me to go to the office @ a certain time so that I can get back before it started to rain. Yup!

<3,
Am

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Sore :(

Its hard to sit & stand up from my chair at work! This exercise program is really working me out! Hahaha its cool though! No pain, no gain baby! Wait till you see me after 90 days! Whaaaapppppa! Lol! I doubt I'll be at my goal but I'm sure there will be a difference when people see me! Hahaha can't wait :)

<3,
Am

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I found it!

I finally have some motivation to study... What is it? Wanting to get out of this stinky (really, it smells) place!

Haha I finished 3 chapters today :)

Hahahaha ok yea...

<3,
Am

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What if...

I had friends that were my age in bakersfield? Would I enjoy my stay a little bit more? Oy... Work keeps me busy during the weekdays... So when I get home to my apartment, I'm just tired & hungry & I catch up with my tv shows, talk to my parents & jerm on the phone for a while... And then sleep. Then on the weekends... I'm so bored outta my mind & think a lot about the "what if's?" Uggghhhh. Like what if this... Blah blah blah... Then maybe I'd enjoy my stay here more.

2 more weeks & it'll be 4 months since I moved out of my parents house in essj. A little over 2 months & ill be here for 6 months.

I can do this. Yes. Lord, I can do this.

Had a chat w/my cousin yesterday through text. Haha. I miss having company. It succccckkks to be alone. I could go to that church I visited & make some friends. But what would be the point if I didn't feel at peace or connected w/anyone there? You know? I need friends in bakersfield :( that are my age... Haha but Yay for unlimited text & mobile to mobile :) hahaha the # of texts in our phone bill reaches thousands... I bet if I was in essj, it wouldn't be that high... Hahaha

I know I've said this before but I truly appreciate my family, bf, friends & pets(nacho&carlton hehe) a whole lot more than I did before. God gives us a limited amount of time here on earth. Life is precious. We're all getting older & I don't wanna look back on times when I could have loved certain people a little bit more. You know?

Because I'm honestly tired of having people come in & out of my life. Looking down on me for what I haven't accomplised... Tired of being fooled that I can trust certain people & in the end, they turn on me... Tired of not having consistent friendships. Tired of all the betrayal & backbiting. Tired of the competition & drama that go along with being a girl! Tired of the PLASTIC!

Hahhaha I'M SO OVER IT! I just wanna be your friend :) but if you don't feel the same, then that's cool too!

I was also tired of helping people. Cuz when they were down & out, I was there. I had yo back! But what about when I was down & out? Nothing. Or if there weren't any problems & I just wanted a friend to talk to? Ohhh you've just been really busy? Ok... But God showed me that its ok if the people I was there for, aren't there for me. I need Him, not them :)

God has blessed me with amazing people! I don't post on fb, twitter, etc calling them out. But I sure hope u guys know who you are :) And that, my friends, is why I miss home... I miss all of the awesome people who keep me sane in this crazy world!!! LOL and when I start missing my amazing family, bf, friends & pets... I start thinking of ways to get back to essj, permenantly! Hahaha never thought I'd say that!

I should sleep now. Goodnight :)

<3,
Am

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MD

The other day, this doctor asked me for my professional opinion. It was tiiiiiiiight! Hahaha I was being treated like I knew something! Awesome feeling :)

Cuz you know that being a newbie in the healthcare field, some seasoned nurses & doctors will eat you alive!

Well, I just wanted to share that experience. It was exciting for me because I was being taken seriously!

Hahaha ok, GOODNIGHT :)

<3,
Am
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"will you just stay with me?"

awww The Notebook is on ABC Family right now... i changed the channel at the perfect time :) this is my favorite scene.

ok. just thought i'd share.

<3,
Am

Not so bad

Being in bakersfield on a friday night... I could be in SJ... But I'm not, so I definitely gotta make the best outta my weekends here...

Tomorrow, I plan on making quiche :) I have a lot of eggs, cheese, & frozen spinach. Just hjave to buy some other ingredients... And then ill put them in a muffin pan. So I can eat one when I'm on the go! Whooohooo! I think ill freeze them too!

I'm thinking of making a steak for dinner tomorrow too! I have sirloin steak that my mom offered me to take hehehe. I can't wait to sleep in and make a pot of coffee. I'm really craving some coffee right now. Oh! I'm trying to get used to drinking coffee without cream/milk. Now I can just drink coffee w/ 2 splenda. But on the weekends, ill take a break & indulge in cream for my coffee hahaha.

So besides cooking & serving my food in cafe world, I pretty much have nothing planned for this weekend...

Ughhh sucks. oh well, gotta do what you gotta do...

<3,
Am

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When I can't have something, that's when I crave it the most!

Hahahaha like seriously! When I'm in SJ, I don't crave filipino food as much. But as soon as I'm in a city with only 2 filipino stores, I start craving adobo & leche flan! Maaaan! This craving is intense lol! I want tinola!

But I wanna give up rice! Haha I don't do lent... But I think for "lent" ill give up rice... Hahahaha I can lose some weight too :)

<3,
Am

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Sunrise/Sunset

By the end of next month, the sun should be rising earlier & setting later... (thanks to daylight savings time)

I'm really excited to start walking to & from work. I see a lot of people doing that all the time! The area seems pretty safe. Lots of people go jogging around here too!

I think the plan will be to put all my work stuff in my backpack. Get to work early, then change into work clothes. Then after work, change back into reg clothes. So I don't walk in dressy shoes. And so I could look more like a student :)

That would save on gas, even though it doesn't take much gas to get to work anyway, which saves me some $$, & it helps the environment. One less car in this polluted city! I have my pepper spray just in case :) hahaha

I'm so excited :) I'm looking forward to it!

<3,
Am

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